the age old debate rages on....

mysterious mask wearing (mega chic) terrorist

vs. wholsome geeky heath ledger look-alike

 guys of the grove, get the look here:

http://www.zegna.com/en/north-america/ermenegildozegna/fashion-show-aw12/looks/656

http://www.esquire.com/blogs/mens-fashion/preppy-clothes-for-men-2012

book release spec-tacular!

the release of J’s follow up book to ‘how to be a successful business woman’, entitled ‘how to be an EVEN more successful business woman’ is looming.  

http://thegrove-w210.blogspot.co.uk/2011/05/how-to-become-efficient-business-woman.html

i’ve just had a sneak peak at some shots from a recent promotional photo-shoot and am, quite frankly, inspired.

*spoiler alert* One of J’s tips is to wear glasses as they make you appear more credible and intelligent. naturally i wanted to show my support so i immediately rushed to an optometrist for an eye test. (popular misconception: i am smarter than i look and i think glasses will help) unfortunately my eyes are absolutely fine so i had to settle for a fake pair. my friend/acquaintance (its complicated), ZW told me where to find these, and THAT is why i’ve been spotted around town sporting these babies. i am currently practicing my handshake technique and creating graphs in excel.

is there a hate button?

i was innocently scrolling through my facebook newsfeed and was left shocked and apalled after happening upon the following status update:

"Shania Twain- Come on Over! What an awesome collection of songs! just chilling listening to her :-)"

what the...? time to de-friend?

it got me thinking about about the things people do on FB that i hate the most;

vague status’s for attention… “my cat is the only one who understands me”. ..”want to drive my car into a brick wall”.

overuse of acronyms and smiley/sad/general faces and punctuation, which also goes alongside lazy grammar and spelling mistakes (especially on purpose)

those who feel the need to share their mundane life with everyone else…”going grocery shopping”…”stuck in traffic”.. WE. DON’T. CARE.

oversharing

confusing facebook with real life

time for a "friends" cull i think...

we interrupt regular programming...

hashtag totes amaze!

confessions of a caffeine addict

in january many people think it’s a good time to make new goals and even give up certain things. for example KW has given up sugar (this includes alcohol!!)

i was left mortified when after (several) calculations i realised i spend a MINIMUM of £500 on a morning coffee annually (large skinny cappuccino, aka three shots of heaven). i decided to give this habit up. i have now been making my own coffee. “but that’s like your signature thing!” exclaimed J in shock.

but just think what I could buy with the £500 i save. so far all I’ve come up with is ONE chloe susan boot (see below post) or breast reduction surgery.

this act has inspired J to give up something to. she informed me that her good looks are her signature thing but she couldn’t give that up (for any monetary gain anyway) so unoriginally has also given up buying coffee. with the money she saves J hopes to sponsor an underprivileged goat in lebanon.

what small changes have you made to save money?

the 80's are so hot right now

" Experts say the riots in Britain were probably trigged by nostalgia. “The 1980s are so hot right now,” said one. “We’ve got a big British royal wedding, famine in the horn of Africa, Madonna singing badly…. It’s totally 1985! Radical!”
According to sociologist and historian, Asbo Gunviolenz, working class British youth feel alienated by not having stuff they see in advertisements, and long for “a simpler time, long long ago, before technology, like the 1980s”.

“The mid-80s were a golden age of social upheaval,” explained Gunviolenz. “You just had to throw a brick through a window and you were hailed as a freedom fighter for literally hundreds of causes, whether it be saving the whales, ending apartheid, or ending whale apartheid.”

But, he said, global nostalgia for the Lamest Decade had seen a dramatic upswing in 80s-related trends.

“Is it significant that while Britain endures the biggest riots since 1985 we endure the biggest hair and shoulder-pads since 1985? I think not.”

He hailed the current remake of ‘Dallas’ as a major step backwards, but begged the Japanese government to stop trying to emulate the Chernobyl disaster with the policy of “reckless nuclear nostalgia”.

Meanwhile Bob Geldof has welcomed the return of the 1980s, saying he is thrilled at the prospect of “getting the old band back together to provide a soundtrack to misery in the Third World”.

“We’re already spitballing some lyrics,” he said, “although we’re battling to find something that rhymes with ‘Somalia’. ‘Ethiopia’ was way easier. Like, you know, ‘Let’s give Ethiopia some hope, yah?’ But Somalia’s a bastard.” "

http://www.hayibo.com/uk-riot-nostalgia-marks-return-to-1980s-golden-age-of-global-panic/  

summer fashion crimes...

here in the grove we love summer. nothing quite beats those few glorious hours of sunshine the great british weather provides. not only does this give us the opportunity to top up our tans (that originated in the med of course) we also get to show off our favourite summery ensembles...
as is the case with most things in life there is always that handful that ruin it for the rest of us- and by ruin i mean burning a hole through my retina and upsetting the atheistically pleasing balance i prefer. below is a handy guide of what not to do!
 
 

 
and as much as we love you iggy im not entirely sure this is appropriate...
 
 

if you would like to share your fashion faux pas with us, or that of others (or simply wish to send us fan mail) drop us a line at w210.thegrove@gmail.com

we will miss winter

there is something very heartwarming and comforting about the unified pessimism that winter brings.
the glamorous greyness of london was disrupted yesterday afternoon as the sun shone for a few minutes...
it took me by surprise, and shook me to the core... although i've been through many seasons before, i'm not a huge fan of change. feelings of nostalgia overwhelmed me as i tried to prioritise the things i would miss most about winter;

* earmuffs, which were personally introduced to me by inventor KW...not only do they keep your ears warm, and look cool, but they also provide protection from the noise of the outside world
* take me out; a tv programme taht is so so bad, it is good (and even better on our new non 13 inch tv)...this has to be our fav contestant to date; jake the cake * albinos

... the only upside of summer that i could think of, is that finally, we will be able to smile and not have our teeth freeze

someone is pointing a gun to your head...

...what would you choose?

curtains

on my flight back from "turkey", i was allocated seat 6C. i could smell the glory of rows 1 to 5 – that of business class, which was within arm’s reach. also, my trained eye for detail could see how they managed to squeeze three seats in cattle class vs the two spacious ones in business

meanwhile the only thing that divided us were salmon coloured curtains and a clear sign that read ‘only business passengers beyond this point’

amazing how such hideous material can make one feel like an under achiever. but what made it worse was the look the perma tanned air hostess (who could easily star in the ‘only way is essex’) kept giving me… it was a disappointing glance, as if saying, had you worked harder, and been more successful, then you too could’ve made it to the sanctuary

but lucky for me;

1. i was sitting next to an overweight midget (who tried to touch my hand at every opportunity) which made the 4 hour flight much more palatable

2. according to the uk government, i am skilled

3. i was going to see T very soon

4. T and i used to live in a sanctuary

first day back

… and to be honest, i was a little anxious. never really understood why emperor TD (traianus Decius) looked so weary – as if he was shouldering heavy responsibilities … but now i’m thinking maybe it was his first day back at work and he was a little nervous about it allsee after such a long break (10 glorious days of doing nothing – when i say nothing i mean loads of fun with T ... and others such as J, G, K, M, N etc), one begins to forget about work and how to effectively do their job. i was starting to panic and questioned myself; would i remember my lines? or would they finally figure it all out

this is not dissimilar to a situation i continuously find myself in - at client meetings. one of the first seemingly simple tasks is to go around the table to introduce yourself… straightforward non? .. you just need to say your name and job title, but for some reason, I always panic… what is my name? (i know this – it shouldn’t be a problem) ... then there is the timing thing – important not to cut off the person before you, but you don’t want to leave a massive gap, then your throat starts to pack up… and I wonder; am I going to speak in the right language?

so, after all of this, i am taking a stress leave of absence (for c. 4 days) and am going to turkey to relax for a weekend

the problem with pleather

just like so many things in life, synthetic leather pants seem like a brilliant idea on paper. not only do they look like leather, but they are also a fraction of the price. it’s a no brainer really…

however, your mother was right - you really do get what you pay for. there is no small print/ or handle with care instructions on these puppies… so here are two thoughts for your consideration;

they are not easy to put on; they take an average of 4 to 5 minutes to squeeze into. this process might get faster given time, but cannot be guaranteed. so, try not to have too many cups of coffee/ tea. this will only lead to you spending more time in the work toilet cubical.. which just looks weird to colleagues - who do not know the challenges of pleather and the complexity that is life
also, there is a very high possibility that you will in fact get stuck to other leather look or real leather upholstery. luckily when i got stuck to the high chair i was sitting on for 40 min, i was having lunch with KW, a close friend, who was able to laugh with me about this most mortifying experience

shenanigans

josh (29 year old singer song writer from california, usa) groban’s people (huxzie boysenberry - no demographic information available) got in touch late yesterday afternoon
without breaching the nda we had to sign; the general feeling was that he wanted to discuss our encouraging views on love [read: wanted to get his hands on the mulberry bag]

his most recent album centres around specific situations he’s found himself in - where love has existed and ultimately failed. other inspirational songs are about the quest for love, and it just not working out
we recommend refraining from listening to this positive, yet almost suicide inducing record during the winter months

love is like a really good tan

a whole week after a mulberry bag purchase … i’m still totally besotted. this is true love
this epiphany got T and i thinking - although we are yet to find that special someone who we like more than ourselves, we have experienced the highs that such a promise holds 1. eros; a passionate physical and emotional love based on aesthetic enjoyment; stereotype of romantic love

2. grecian goddess love; love of a grecian goddess/ falafels
4. lisbonese; love of giong to lisbon on your 6th wedding anniversary (not be confused with lesbanese)
8. ludus; a love that is played as a game or sport; conquest
9. puppy love; love of small animals
3. storge; an affectionate love that slowly develops from friendship, based on similarity (perhaps like T and i – based on really great looks)
6. pragma; love that is driven by the head, not the heart (think shakira; my heart is saying no, but my body is saying let’s go)
0. mania; obsessive love; experience great emotional highs and lows; very possessive and often jealous lovers (romeo and juilett)
5. agape; selfless altruistic love; spiritual; motherly

10. pronia; not for this blog

you see, there are countless types of loves

... match the correct description to the images to be in to win (we have matched some up - to help you out... hint; there is a patern)

under pressure

in 2009, there were 267 babies born every minute in the world (earth)

as of 2009, the average birth rate for the world (earth) is 21.4 per year per 1000 total population. so with the world's (earth) population at c6.6 billion, that comes to 141 million babies per year

as expected, there were 365 days in 2009, each day consisting of 24 hours and 60 minutes per hour, so 365 x 24 x 60= 525600 minutes per year

as stated above (third sentence) in 2009 there were c. 141 000 000 babies born per year, divided by 525 600 minutes per year = 267 babies born every minute

...but, the question is; what happens when mums to be are surrounded by brilliantly competent mums? and their generally cool babies?

example 1. indy is an inspiring model (he likes T and the work she does)… his passion is more for jewellery and fashion. it’s a new love that he is fully embracing. but this is an ambitious boy – recently, he’s also been singing and dancing to nirvana

M (his mum) is happy to be raising the next big thing in teenage angst singing genious

example 2. Jake. beautiful – no effort required from D (his mum)

..this pressure can be overwhelming (refer to jedward rendition of ice ice baby) and is enough to drive some into question their parenting skills

our ever increasing stardom has meant that we occasionally get the odd free mcqueen and balmain outfits, but to be offered a baby (even if it's ugly) is the best recognition of our good looks we've had to date

despite the below, T and i are not baby people and quite frankly were surprised the mums let us hold their little ones. but years of modelling has taught us a trick or two

из России с любовью....(from russia with love)

today is the best day of our lives.

for some inexplicable reason J and i are both obsessed with the russian federation (this is the official name of russia). a little known fact: we are both descendents of famous russian mob families. the mafia link is the only basis of our "friendship". people assume it is great looks, that is just a coincidence...
anyway.. today is the day we learnt that our blog has a russian following, something we have been working towards for a very long time
here are 3 other reasons why we love russia:

1) russia is a transcontinental country, extending halfway around the northern hemisphere and covering much of eastern and north-eastern europe and the whole of northern asia

2) as per the 1993 constitution, russia has a democratic and federal government system, which stands divided into executive, legislative and judicial branches

3) russia houses more than 100 different ethnic groups, representing a multiplicity of national histories and cultures and distinct language groups, including indo-european slavic, turkic, finno-ugric and others

the wonderful Winie (spelled Juanita, pronounced Whanita)

after years of being really really good looking and general marvellousness, Winnie has decided to embark on another adventure...we wish her all the very best, and know she will shine and be amazing wherever she lands

playing with the boundaries of normal social conduct

odd things happen to people all the time: fact

this particular incident took place on the number 23 bus at approximately 2000 hours (8pm) on the way home last night. it would have been good if T was there - she has been working out and her guns would've come in handy (but she wasn't)i spotted a spare aisle seat next to this guy... (so far: normal)

just before mon derriere hit the seat he asked ‘would you like the window seat? … you get a better view’

i believe that in every instance/ aspect of life/ interaction/ situation/ you come across an exit point. a lot of the time, it’s not obvious …but the opportunity is there

in this case – that should’ve been my exit point… but instead, i replied:

‘no thanks’ (clearly i don’t catch the bus for the scenery)

i sat in the seat (trying to minimise the space i took up)

he proceeded to listen to some (from what i could hear) rap music… then he started singing

i might've flinched/ the evil thoughts must’ve somehow come through my usually controlled facial expressions

i think he missunderstood and thought it was an invitation to speak again... as he asked if i wanted to listen to some music? (and catch an STD?!) i thought

‘no thanks’ came the reply

he looked at me… like a concerned parent looks at a child who wants to eat a worm... ‘are you ok?’

(am I OK???)

‘i’ve had a rough day’ i found myself saying

as he attempted to touch my shoulder … my life flashed before my eyes… i got off the bus (3 stops early) and ran home

it made me think, among other things, that there are more special/ different people out there than we think... and that perhaps not all statistics/ claims can be trusted